First dates are scary for everyone. If you like the person, there’s no way for it not to be. The key is being yourself despite the nervousness. Of course, that’s not always easy either. Here are our 7 favorite pieces of first date advice.
Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff
What to drink, what to eat, who pays. These are all things people worry about on dates when they’re nervous. None of these things matter. If you’re going to be nervous about anything, don’t let it be the petty things.
Focus on getting to know the person. Focus on sharing yourself. The small things will figure themselves out.
Allow Yourself To Be Nervous
One of the reasons your anxiety may compound is that you tell yourself it’s wrong. It’s weak. You’re not allowed to feel this way.
Emotions are natural. You’re nervous, because you’re excited. That’s allowed. You’re nervous, because there’s a risk of finding something special. Also, allowed.
Give yourself permission to be nervous. Tell your date you’re nervous. It’s good to share. Odds are, they’re nervous, too.
It’s important to dress well. Looks aren’t everything, but they’re not nothing. Our way of dress expressed who we think we are. If you dress well, it shows self-respect and awareness. If you dress sloppy, well…
It also shows your date you put in effort to look nice. How you present on the first date is an indicator of how you’ll behave if the relationship continues. You don’t need to be flashy, but wear clothes that fit. And looking good is always a great way to get a confidence boost to start a date.
Ditch The Small Talk
Well, not entirely. Small talk is a good way to see how your date interacts with new people, but don’t let the conversation get bogged down by the recent weather. Big, deep talk is how you’ll make an impression. Ask them questions about their passions and dreams. Listen and respond in kind with your own. Engaging their emotions is how you’ll strike a connection.
If you really like the person you’re on a first date with, it’s great to let them know you’re enjoying their company. But don’t go overboard and declare your love for them on date one.
Both men and women become much less desirable if they’re all over someone too quickly. So don’t play games, but don’t give away all your cards at once either. Be a little bit mysterious. Hold some feelings back until you go on a few more dates.
Be Upfront and Honest
Let them know what you’re looking for, whether it’s a second date, a marriage, or nothing. There’s no use tailoring your feelings to theirs. It’s not your job and it’ll cause more pain in the long run.
First dates are hard, but once you’ve done a few they’re not as big of a deal. It’s a muscle to be able to go out and meet new people. Try not to take rejection personally and be nice. Do that and you’ll do fine.