Asking a girl out is a struggle. You’re probably wondering what to say. Or what she’ll say to you when you find the words. Try not to overthink it. Everyone fears rejection. Unfortunately, at the end of the day, you still have to ask her out if you want a shot.
Here are the best ways to ask a girl out on a date:
Engage Her Interest
If you know what she likes to do for fun, start from there. It’s easier to ask someone out when you have some idea of her interests. If you no absolutely nothing about her, but the conversation is rolling, just ask. If she likes art, suggest a gallery. If she likes Netflix, suggest a movie. Every interest has an appropriate date suggestion.
If you’re new to chatting with someone, it’s always intimidating to get the ball rolling. But you can always move the conversation during a natural pause. During the first break, ask her what she does for fun and lead that into suggesting a date. It’s simple.
Live An Active Lifestyle
Now, I’m not saying you need to have a pre-planned activity anytime a date comes along, but it helps when you hear her interests to already have things you yourself enjoy doing. That way, when it comes to making a suggestion, some of the time you’ll have something in the vein planned or you’ll know where to seek out said activity. Expanding your own interests can help with this big time.
Detach From the Outcome
One of the big reasons people don’t make a move is the fear of rejection. Once again, don’t overthink things or worse make things mean what they don’t. The worse thing that can happen is she says no. There’s nothing else. She won’t publicly humiliate you. She won’t tell all your friends about your audacity. She’ll say no, and you’ll both move on with your lives.
When someone rejects your offer for a date, it’s not a reflection on who you are, though it may feel personal. Know that you tried the thing that many people don’t have the courage to. Accept it gracefully and move on. Say “see you around” and move on with your life.
Be Mindful of How You Present
When you’re talking, maintain good eye contact and posture. Keep your tone of voice bright and confident. Do not look at your phone. Try to make light physical contact to show comfort. Usually a pat on the back of the arm is enough.
People pick up on body language and vibe subconsciously and will take cues on how to treat you based on the energy you give off. Wait for a gap in conversation to suggest a hangout and don’t beat around the bush about it.
Confidence is sexy and despite what all those self-help books may tell you, confidence isn’t always a constant. It can waiver depending on the situation. You may not always have it when you most need it, but when you do need it try to remember a time when you felt in your element. And fake it until you make it. Most people can’t tell. If they can, well, then better luck next time.
Keep It Brief
If you can tell through her body language that she’s mutually attracted to her, then you shouldn’t have to do a whole lot when you ask her out. Don’t keep on dragging it out. Talk a bit, but then get the question out and save something for the date.
The truth is asking a girl out isn’t easy for anyone. There’s always the fear of rejection and the more you do it the better you get at it. But it never goes away entirely, you just learn to bounce back faster. The most important thing is to try it yourself and see what works. A lot of it is about feel and learning to be sensitive to the other person’s feelings about you. Then, of course, actually doing it. Good luck.